Fractured Fairy Tales

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Post  switza on Thu May 06, 2010 4:29 pm

Because the 4 of you like to read, I have some stories I want you to read. Your job as a team is to rank the stories from best to worst. You can rank them however you want, but I need a consensus decision by 9pm eastern. The official ranking can be submitted by any of the 4 of you and must be posted on this thread.

The stories are below.


Last edited by switza on Thu May 20, 2010 3:19 am; edited 1 time in total

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Post  switza on Thu May 20, 2010 3:09 am

"Biancabella and the Mole"

It was 1969 and the Molito family (Which was just a man - Luciano and his wife - Louisa). The Molito's had always wanted children, but it was just not in the cards. They practiced twice a day even, and yet, Luciano's swimmers never quite made it far enough. One night after arguing about their situation and Luciano feeling like he was a failure, Louisa opted to sleep in the garden on the hammock he had installed for her. For months now, they had been infested with moles, and they kept making holes in their beautiful garden.

As she slept, Louisa must of been quite knocked out cuz a Mole ran right up her woohoodilly. A couple months went by and the Molito's found out they were going to have a aby. It was such a joyous moment for them.

When it was time to deliver their baby, the midwives notice something wrong, the little girl that ame out had a mole in her hand. The Mole quickly escaped as the midwives yelled out loud. MOLE.

10 years went by and nothing was ever out of the Ordinary. Little Biancabella was healthy and intelligent, but she always liked to chew on wood and dig holes. No one's perfect thought the Molito's.

ONe day as she was digging up their garden, Molatinara, a Mole came to her and told her she was her sister. That they needed to stick together and if Biancabella did as she said, she'd always be happy, but really miserable and would have bleeding hair if she din't do as Molatinara said.

The Mole then ordered her to bring two buckets, one of milk and one of rosewater. When Biancabella returned to the house, she was distressed so her mother asked her what made her so sad. Biancabella asked for the buckets, which her mother gave her, and she carried them into the garden. The Mole then had Biancabella pour some of the buckets on her head and soak the tip of her big toe in the milk bucket.. She became even more beautiful, and when her hair was combed it shed skittles, and when her hands were washed, they shed flowers.

Years had passed since the Mole had been to vosit Biancabella. She was so beautiful, everyone wanted her. SHe was so happy and gifted. Her father offered her hand to the King of Venice. They were happy, but Biancabella wanted to see her sister. She called upon Molatinara many tims, and never got an answer. She figured she must of disobeyed her and started sinking into depression. Her husband. Roberto was by her side, but he had an evil stepmother watching his every move. You see, his stepmom had other plans, she wanted him to marry her daughter. The ugly fat pimply one.

He eventually went off to war, leaving his depressed and lonely wife at home. Thge step mother ordered her to die, but the guards decided they would only gauge her eyes out and cut her hands off.

The stepmother then disguised her daughter to look like the gorgeous Biancabella and told everyone the Queen was ill. She had to find something to exppolain such ugliness. The king was devastated upon his return and Biancabella was a prisoner. An eyeless prisoner at that. Her sister, the Mole she had grew to love and respect, didn't come to her calls, didn't seek to rescue her. She was doomed.

Fortunatly, the guards got sick of looking at an eyeless handless freak and dumped her into the woods. An old couple found her and after brushing her hair for months, they had enough skittles to start a business and become successful., One day Biancabella had enough. Sh e wantd her eyes, her hands, her husband, her ,Mole. She took a knife and started pressing it against her wrist. SUddenly, Molatinara came to her and stopped her from the kill. Biancabella fell to her knees and begged for forgiveness. The Mole then restored her hands and eyes and she herself turned into a woman.

They both found their way back to the caxstle and explained the story to King Roberto, who sentenced his steomother and daughter to death by Skittles eating. After 5 days of continuously eating skittles, the stepmother keeled over and died. The daughter took 7 days, but she kept the red ones for last.

The king, the mole and Biancabella lived happily ever after


The moral of this story. "Never doubt a Mole's capabilty, they;re MAGIC"

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Post  switza on Thu May 20, 2010 3:12 am

Once upon a time, there was a young married couple who were very poor. This couple wanted nothing more than to have a baby. They just lived by themselves with their talking pet squirrel. Little did they know that their squirrel was actually secretly planted in their house by the evil witch who lived next door.

When the wife became pregnant, she needed to eat lots of vegetables to keep herself healthy, but her husband could not afford them. He snuck over the fence to steal some from the witch who lived next door. As he was stealing the vegetables, the squirrel scurried over to the witches house and told her that he was stealing. The witch came out and caught the husband in the act of stealing. He explained to her why he needed the vegetables for his pregnant wife. The witch said he could keep the vegetables if he gave her the child when she was born. The husband, still unaware of the rogue squirrel, agreed, assuming the witch would forget about the child. How wrong he would soon find out he was.

When the baby girl was born, they named her Rapunzel. They thought they could keep Rapunzel a secret from the witch next door, but the squirrel scurried over to her house and told the witch in the dead of night. The witch immediately came over and snatched Rapunzel away from her parents and locked her in a tower, so they could never find her. The witch sent the squirrel to live with her so she would never be alone. Rapunzel grew up in that tower, with the talking squirrel as her only friend. Or so she thought.

The witch had Rapunzel grow her hair very long so she could climb up her hair to visit her in the tower. One day when Rapunzel was eighteen years old, a prince saw the witch climb down Rapunzel's hair and go back to her house. The prince cried out to Rapunzel to let down her hair, and Rapunzel did. The prince climbed up and Rapunzel told her all about herself and how she lived in the tower her whole life. The prince came back every day until the two of them fell in love.

Rapunzel and the prince were plotting their escape so they could run back to Rapunzel's parents and live happily ever after. The plan was to cut off Rapunzel's hair and tie it to the pole outside of the window, so both of them could climb down it and escape. They told the pet squirrel of their plans, and the pet squirrel agreed to come with them to keep watch for the witch. The pet squirrel secretly told the witch about their plans, so they could be prepared for when Rapunzel and the prince tried to escape.

When the day came for Rapunzel and the prince to escape, they cut off Rapunzel's hair, tied it to the pole and began to climb down. The witch, who was hiding in the woods waiting for them, started to walk towards them and gave the signal to the squirrel. The squirrel quickly began to chew on Rapunzel's hair until the knot was undone and her hair came loose. Rapunzel and the prince then quickly fell to their deaths. The witch then cooked them up and ate them for dinner.

The moral of this story is never trust a talking squirrel.

The End.

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Post  switza on Thu May 20, 2010 3:13 am

The Princess Mole & The Pea

Once upon a time there was a prince mole who wanted to marry a princess mole in the kingdom of Moledom; but she would have to be a real princess mole named Bertha. He travelled all over the world to find one, but nowhere could he get what he wanted. There were princesses enough, but it was difficult to find out whether they were real ones; especially with the name Bertha. There was always something about them that was not as it should be. So he came home again and was sad, for he would have liked very much to have a real princess mole named Bertha.

One evening a terrible storm came on; there was thunder and lightning, and the rain poured down in torrents. Suddenly a knocking was heard at the city gate, and the old king mole went to open it.

It was a princess mole standing out there in front of the gate. But, good gracious! what a sight the rain and the wind had made her look. The water ran down from her hair and clothes; it ran down into the toes of her shoes and out again at the heels. And yet she said that she was a real princess mole, with the name Bertha.

"Well, we'll soon find that out," thought the old Queen mole. But she said nothing, went into the bed-room, took all the bedding off the bedstead, and laid a pea on the bottom; then she took twenty mattresses and laid them on the pea, and then twenty eider-down beds on top of the mattresses.

On this the princess mole had to lie all night. In the morning she was asked how she had slept.

"Oh, very badly!" said she. "I have scarcely closed my eyes all night. Heaven only knows what was in the bed, but I was lying on something hard, so that I am black and blue all over my body. It's horrible!"

"Whats your name princess mole?" asked the queen mole. "Well its Bertha." said the princess mole.

Now they knew that she was a real princess mole named Bertha because she had felt the pea right through the twenty mattresses and the twenty eider-down beds.

Nobody but a real princess mole with the name Bertha could be as sensitive as that.

So the prince mole took her for his wife, for now he knew that he had a real princess mole with the name Bertha; and the pea was put in the museum, where it may still be seen, if no one has stolen it. The two moles went on to have little mole-lettes with the name Faye & Crangle.

The End

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Post  Christix on Thu May 20, 2010 4:09 pm

2
1
3

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Post  switza on Thu May 20, 2010 7:25 pm

if anybody else wants to add their input, you have about an hour and a half. Otherwise, Christi's list will be the one you use.

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